after so much things, i realise how helpless can i be... and the useless me only know how to cry and not how to solve my own problem. Or should i say i've tried. but i'm choiceless?
I plug in my mp3 & started crying, so that i would not hear my own sobbing... and then i fell asleep... woken up by dine's msg.. so glad that dine came to accompany me after her work. I din wanted her to do so... coz i dun wanna cry in front of her or anyone of my friends. But it really hurts me too much, and dine sense the unusualness in me, and insist on meeting me.
I have never wanted to borrow money from others, be it family or friends. But I have tried my best to help others out, with some bad debts which i know cannot be returned to me.
Now i know how hard it is to borrow from others. Really.
U guys can nvr understand that kind of hurt i'm getting & feeling right now. With such friends that tell u straight in the face "sorry, i'm not a bank"... and when u feel like talking to someone just to release ur emotions, they tell u "aiyo~ cry simi lan... so much things to cry abt mehz?"
I start to question myself... are these really call friends? i think they are even worse than any strangers i would meet up in the streets.
What i wanna say is, of coz i know i can always take bank loans, but the interest that they are charging is really gonna kill me. Dun ask me abt my brother, coz i know he is not gonna help me much this time round. Bank loan will be my last resort. 15June. Either i make it or i lose it.
I'm not a person who will easily borrow from people ard me w/o thinking how do i repay back for ur info. I hate bad debts myself, i wun do that to any of my close ones. Now i know what is f.r.i.e.n.d.s ..... this world is simply too realistic and cruel. Watch out people...
Shuying is gonna start anew.... with a new set of resolutions...